I have been having problems with my teeth for quite a while now but haven’t had insurance to get them taken care of. I certainly can’t pay for it myself – When I went to get the initial visit a few months ago, they estimated around $3,500 I believe. Yea. Fucking. Right.

Since I finally got insurance cards, my teeth have been hurting worse and worse as the hours and days pass by, so I finally started calling dentists a few days ago. I called every dentist in the phone book and found ONE that takes my insurance. I called them back today and told them I need an appointment ASAP. They told me to call back after 5pm to check and see if there are cancellations for tomorrow. When I did, they told me to come in any time before 2pm. I want to cry, but I don’t know whether it’s out of terror or relief.

I am so, so scared of the dentist. Every time I get in the chair, I have a massive anxiety attack. My mom told me she’d give me a couple Clonopin, but I know she’ll only give me like, two, and that isn’t going to help me at all. Thankfully I got my Xanax prescription filled today, so I can take a couple of those as well. I also decided to pick up a 12-pack of Miller High Life to drink between tonight and tomorrow, so hopefully I won’t be feeling any fear.

My only hitch is that I can’t eat or drink anything after midnight because I have a regular doctor’s appointment at 9:40am to get bloodwork, and I have to fast beforehand.I completely forgot about it when I made my plan to get plastered tonight, and I’m kinda pissed about it. I’m going to have to figure out how to get some beers down between the doctor’s and the dentist. This isn’t going to be easy…

I woke up at like, 1:30 today to a message from Hubby asking if I could find another ride to the doctors today. I went into a panic – No, I can’t – A) Tommy won’t do a damn thing to help me out and B) He’s not even home to beg. He messaged me back as I was responding that said never mind, he’d be here around 2. Phew. I couldn’t have even called to cancel my appointments; we don’t have a telephone hooked up yet.

I got to my doctor’s appointment around 2:45, fifteen minutes early. They gave me the usual packet of papers and I sat down to fill them out. Before I was even half done with the first page, they were calling my name to go into the exam room. The nurse said I could finish my papers in there. She asked me to step on the scale, so I did – backwards. I told her I didn’t want to see what it said. She took my temperature and blood pressure, and told me the doctor would be in shortly.

I finished the first page and the doctor walked in and introduced himself. He started asking me questions about my back and told me that he wanted me to try seeing a Chiropractor, and if that doesn’t work, a Physical Therapist. After that, we moved on to my anxiety. I explained how I felt on a daily basis and he said that my anxiety level is over his head, he doesn’t know what to even suggest since I’ve taken all of the medications that he would have prescribed and had no improvement. He said he wants me to see a Psychiatrist ASAP and try to get on something that will work.

He also gave me the number for a Gastroenterologist and said he wants me to call them if the anxiety medications don’t help with my stomach problems as well. I have to go back on Wednesday to get some blood work, and two weeks after the Psychiatrist to update him on how I’m doing. In the meantime, he gave me a prescription for .5mg of Xanax for when I need them. Finally, a doctor willing to give me something that works!

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